Account Terminated

My name is Roland and i am interested in studying magic.
When i was 8 years old, at my older brother Joseph's party,
him, my mom and my sister were cursed with a sleeping curse.
They have been sleeping since that day.
To forget the pain i have took some kind of occlumency lessons
with a doctor, although it didn't help in forgeting, i don't have that many nightmares about what happened.I heard occlumency is
useful against spells like the imperiatus curse.
When i turned 11, i got my Hogwarts letter and had to accept.
I will try to find the counter-curse for this new type of spell, make the witch pay, and redeem our family's legacy, as I am a Targaryen and,somehow the grand grand grand grand(insert grands) son of the Mad King, and grand grand grand(insert one less grand here than last time) son of Daenerys Targaryen, the " mother of all dragons".(she is called that because she loved and studied and used dragons in her wars).
Me and my friends had an unfortunate hiatus for months; we would rarely speak to each other as a result. I began to feel lonely and maybe slightly depressed. It wasn't until after my OWL exams that I began doing everything possible, so I was busy enough not to pay attention to the mild sadness that had swallowed me entirely.Sometimes, it doesn't matter wheter I practice spells or cook, either way, a short lived, but meaningful thought always manages to sneak in, and that feeling makes its presence felt. I can easily come off as wierd for that, you can often see me zoning out and being quiet in general.

But don't get me wrong, I love them with every bit of my existence, (They are also the ones that get 100% discount on my food, so if you are not one of them. Go scram and get your wallet). With that dire event, I understood that my career isn't sunshine and rainbows and I must do everything in order to value my relationships with people. No matter their flaws, we humans have all the shades of gray, but we are still humans and every living being is valuable somehow to the balance of things, ...and... most importantly.. I wouldn't want to see anybody being decapitated.. .ever again!Ryan, Gen, Cassie, Leah, Rowan(and Amber).. they are all important to me.Although, I've only started to see them more only recently, I can tell something shady is going on! Jack's file missing?Poor Gen is so pale.. she's like .... dying. She's "fine", even though I rarely show it, sometimes I am secretly angry whenever people tell me they're "fine", when I can actually see the painful flickler of emotions in their eyes, and I often mildly blame myself for that. Something major might be going down without me knowing it.. just like that one time... and I don't want people to die anymore!I'm clearly scared of losing everyone, sometimes I act wierdly when somebody I love is seemingly in danger, I sometimes act way too carelessly when my loved ones are around, sometimes I am too soft on them.... I love people too much... for my own good.
My boggart is the sight of all of their corpses and heads sitting on the plain, bloody floor.

I don't feel as myself anymore, but a whole different person. It might be because I've aged quite a bit,I am taller, my hair got unexplainably curly... maybe I've grown up, finally.I've began studying protective and healing spells.It seems that inventing spells had become a really common thing around here, so I must do my best as a .... maybe soon-to-become or maybe fully-grown auror to protect my teammates from the odds of dark magic. Don't worry, transfiguration still holds some of my favorites, although I must admit.. my wand is made for protective spells, so I've inevitably grown a liking for those, too.Some of my spells include Aquaclipeum, the water shield, or Divina Stratum.. although.. I wouldn't recommend you to try the latter, in case of failure the backlash is so hard, not even I tend to use it, I refer to it as a forgotten experiment of mine( I am so fucking embarassed of it, duh!). I am currently researching the silver shield Voldemort used against Dumbledore, it was able to block one of his most powerful spells.
(OOC: this has been an idea of mine, I don't know how it can fit into any of the roleplays..)
Last summer, me and my sister was roaming England and Europe to find the needed runes for the sleeping curse's countercurse, it was really hard, but we managed to obtain 3 of the 5 runes we need to wake up everybody affected by it. We made many difficulties and met many people, had bounties on our heads(HOPE RYAN AND GEN WILL NEVER READ MY DIARY!), met many people(Looking at you, Hellsing,Amira!), be it foreign or one I already know.We learned secrets about the world, nothing interesting honestly.We visited libraries with old scrolls and dusty, boring books and found out something taboo, what we never meant to know about :
Their skin shines like gold in the sea of chaos,
Their breath is colder than the coldest ice,
They have no conception of time, death is just a game
They are the ones laughing at you in the darkest hours,
They are the voices which come from your heart's sins,
and haunt you in your darkest fears and dreams,
Their whisper often make even the bravest fall-
the shadows truly are the most wicked of them all.
I've been seeing them everywhere ever since, I can't tell, but the forbbiden forest is full of them, they are creatures of the dark, probably thought to go extinct, but they apparently learned to be mostly invisible, they can turn. Anyway, I don't understand how they have never been seen by anyone, maybe it's better that I don't know. These monsters can mess with your depression and anxiety, as they gain power from their negative emotions.Why can I see them exactly now is beyond me.I've also learned a pelicular form of magic that can only effect them, and only them. It's tabo, I can't tell anybody.There have been many pelicular events.Though, Everything's cool, I don't have any reasons to.. yet at least. Being the only one I know who can see them..those scary ..things... makes me feel that I've changed completely.. am I still me? Am I sane?
I've been writting everything my top-mega-ultra-ultime-level-secret diary.
ANYBODY WHO FUCKING DARES TO READ IT IS GOING TO GET SHOT IN THE HEAD! YOU HEAR ME?I'M GOING TO PERSONALLY BIND YOU UP AND TORTURE YOU AT WHATEVER LOW LEVEL OF SANITY MY PSHYC PLEASES TO GRANT ME ON THAT UNFORTUNATE DAY!